Her voice was soft but strained, it was obvious she had been crying.
“Hi Laitu! This is The1Habitat, you booked a call with us for this time?”
“Yes!… I did.” She said her voice cracking.
“You don’t sound too good Laitu, what’s wrong?”
“I’m not fine, I feel terrible…; my relationship is far from okay…” She replied sniffing as she went on. “My boyfriend has been distant lately, I called him and he said he wants to be alone, He is even planning a two (2) week break and for these two (2) weeks he won’t be reachable because he’s going to switch off his cellphone, and I don’t understand why. I mean we didn’t have a fight or anything.”
Laitu began sobbing at this point.
“It’s okay dear, just let it all out… I’m here for you.” It took her a moment to pull herself together, and she continued.
“…You see, our relationship began early this year and we’ve been together for about six (6) months. He has two (2) kids, but from different relationships, yet that didn’t stop us since he claimed he takes good care of his kids but has nothing to do with their mums. I know you might not understand but he’s a very nice person, I like that he respects my family and I so much and even pushes me to achieve my goals. I can be a bit stubborn but he’s someone I really respect.
I’ve been studying for my certification exams and it’s been a pretty busy period for me, in spite of that, I still make out time to stay with him. During my last stay, I decided to talk about his baby mamas, and just like that, he started keeping his distance from me and I have no idea what to do.” Laitu started sobbing again. “I really do love him and I’m so confused.” She said in between sobs “… “please help me!”
At this moment I took a deep breath, and gave her a moment.
When it seemed she had gained a little composure I said to her.
“Hey Laitu, “it’s alright!” It’s okay to be sad, it’s okay to cry, but you know what isn’t okay Laitu? To stay sad.” I continued…”You’re worth a lot more Laitu, do you believe that?”
To which she quietly answered. “Yes I do.” So I pressed on.
“Tell me do you think you deserve a man that will fight for you and respect you?”
“Yes I do” she replied.
“Do you think your boyfriend respects you enough to tell you why he’s disappearing for 2weeks?”
“No!”she said “In fact, sometime last month he traveled with a friend for the holiday and kept saying he’s thinking of staying there permanently, not considering how I would feel… All I’ve done is encourage him, I don’t know what next to do…” Her voice trailed off she sounded distraught.
“Breathe Laitu! Breathe!!!” I said to her reassuringly, then I went on; “You realize you can’t be a doll on a shelf waiting for him, especially for the fact that you have no clue what he is up to.” I said
“Okay! You know what? Lets try this. Why don’t you send him a text message? In the text message, tell him you would like to know what this two week break really means for both of you. This way you’re giving him an opportunity to explain himself and if he doesn’t reply please note that NO MESSAGE IS ALSO A MESSAGE! You shouldn’t beat yourself up or keep waiting for him.” I said emphatically. “Step out Laitu! And please do what you love, anything that makes you happy. Hey, you talked about a certification exam,what’s up with that?” I asked.
“My studies are going very well thank you” Laitu promptly responded.
“Oh that’s good, glad to hear that.” I said and pushed on. “You can make use of this opportunity you know? Just let it serve as your push factor; prove to everyone and most especially to yourself, that you are amazing, and you are indeed worthy.” I continued…
“Okay, Laitu! Tell me four (4) to five (5) years from now would you be happy you kept your life on hold for him?”
“No I won’t ” she replied, sounding calmer.
“So pick yourself up Laitu, have a shower, see a movie, I’d even recommend a comedy. Just do something that makes you happy. But, remember to please yourself; healing is a process, so please allow yourself go through the process.” I said hoping she fully understood, so I asked. “Do you you understand?”
“Yes! I do! I do! Thank you! I’ll do all that you’ve told me. Thank you so much for this session. I really needed to talk to someone today, I’m just glad I found The1Habitat. Thank you guys, you are indeed amazing.” Laitu said sounding a lot better.
“Would you like The1Habitat to check in on you from time to time?” I asked her.
“Oh! Yes please! She answered eagerly;
“I would love it!!!” She exclaimed.
“That’s okay! Stay strong Laitu” I said
“I will, good night!” With that she ended the call.